NSFW Gamer’s Top Games of 2012

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

Well, it looks like the Mayans were wrong and 2012 has come to an end without the world being destroyed.

Who’da thunk it?

Not the History Channel, that’s for sure. So since we are all still here we might as well have an obligatory year-end list of our favorite NSFW games of the year.

Here’s the deal, each of our writers listed their top 3 picks and broke down why each game made the cut. Keep in mind that “not safe for work” doesn’t have to just mean sex and/or nudity…though it usually does.

Let’s get to it!

Anystrom0

1. Lollipop Chainsaw

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

This is going to be a popular game on this page, and it should be. Not only did it feature teenage Juliet Starling parading around in a skirt and tight top while chainsawing zombies in the face, the game was a goddamned blast to play. Suda 51’s trademark brand of humor, commentary, and outlandish presentation inspired my very first column for this site, and I predicted at the time that Lollipop Chainsaw would be a sleeper contender for Game of the Year. While it seems to have mostly garnered a few category-specific nominations, I stand by what I said. We were belted over the head with sequels this year, and Lollipop Chainsaw was not one of them. What other game has ever inspired a porn parody? Yeah, keep thinking.

2. Mortal Kombat: Komplete Edition

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

If you want to accuse me of copping out, fuck off. Yes, this game was originally released in 2011, but that version of one of the best fighters of the year didn’t include one of the female ninjas who consists entirely of spilled blood. This puts the roster of lady fighters with tits the size of your head at about a baker’s dozen, plus every other downloadable character and costume that was released throughout the year. Mortal Kombat has some of the most distracting combatants this side of a Team Ninja project, and it almost makes you want to choose Mileena just to see how much of that costume will be stripped away by damage. Being able to get access to all of the content with the game for half the cost of the original is enough cause to grab your joystick.

3. Resident Evil 6

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

How many of you have fantasized about what Ada Wong is hiding underneath that red dress for years and years? You can thank Capcom and the visual design team of Resident Evil 6 for making your wettest dreams come true and showing us more of RE’s mystery woman than we ever expected to see. She might first appear to have gotten breast implants since we last saw her firing a machine gun in RE4, but you’ll understand everything that is going on when you play the game as her. RE6 got a lot of unfair criticism for trying to do everything at once. While they may have slipped up in a few areas, Capcom got both Ada’s story and body down pat.

GLCORP

1. Mass Effect 3

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

I can never say enough good things about the staff over at Bioware and the games they put out time after time. Say what you will about the ending (personally, I thought it was fine), but the road that took us there was so amazing that, in my opinion, this game paid off big time. On top of that, from an NSFW stand point, I really do feel this game nailed both sexy women and great game play the whole way through. I really could just go off on a long rant about this game, but I need to keep it short so yeah, go play it and if you have never played the entire series, I urge you to go get the trilogy because it is worth the hours you will sink into it.

2. Borderlands 2

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

We featured quite a bit of Borderlands 2’s sexy ladies here at NSFW Gamer with two Girl of the Week spots and a Catfight, so it’s pretty easy to see why this one made my list. On top of that, there is a great game behind those sexy women. Built from the ground up to be enjoyed with friends time and time again, it is a game where you do truly get your money’s worth. While by no means a perfect game, the sum of its parts make it one that was very easy for me to place on this list, and is even easier to recommend if you have not picked it up yet.

3. Lollipop Chainsaw

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

My number 3 took some thought, but in the end if I had to pick a 3rd game of 2012 that really took me by surprise. It was Lollipop Chainsaw. I know, I know, the game play is uneven across the board, but I really feel this is pretty forgivable because the parts that are enjoyable are very enjoyable. Hell, even in that parts that are bad the banter between Juliet and Nick is just something that should not be missed. Oh yeah, and Juliet is dead fucking sexy…I mean holy fuck, the reason I kept dying in this game was because I kept staring at her and all her awesome costumes that came packaged on the game (evilly glares to his copy of Dead or Alive 5). So yeah, if you passed on this one give it a shot. It is at least worth a weekend of your time.

KamikazeQ

1. Sleeping Dogs

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

With all the games on the market that mimic the open world gameplay pioneered by Grand Theft Auto, it’s rare for a contender to really stand out. Sleeping Dogs manages to do that by mixing concepts from other hit action games with the True Crime theme of your character as an undercover cop. Sleeping Dogs brings the slow motion shoot dodge of Max Payne and mixes it with a simplistic but deep hand-to-hand combat system. It’s akin to running around Liberty City’s Chinatown district pretending you’re a Matrix fan boy, and it actually worked pretty well to hold my interest. For a game that spent years in development hell, I think it did a good job to refresh a genre that is on the verge of being overused.

2. Dishonored

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

Bethesda Softworks has spent the last couple of years trying to grow their list of intellectual properties past the Elder Scrolls and Fallout franchises, and Dishonored seems to have earned its place. What made Dishonored work was the “whale-punk” setting of the game. Exploring this world based off whale oil powered technologies captivated me from the start in a way that no game since the original Bioshock has managed. The addition of a valid morality system that not only affected the game’s ending, but the environment as you progressed drew me in deeper. If I had played Corvo Attano like a messenger of bloody vengeance, not only would the guards fortify and strengthen their resolve with each throat I slit, but the body count would result in an increase in the plague of rats that cursed the city. While the stealthy and non-lethal path proved more difficult to adhere to, it also provided more creative ways to carry out tasks and the option to completely humiliate and discredit your foes to the point where they longed for death. While some may have criticized the fact that the gameplay was based around fully explorable levels as opposed to a completely open world environment, I feel that feature added a structure that is lost in other open world games. Unlike Skyrim where you might spend days exploring the world and forget completely about the story; in Dishonored the plot takes center stage at all times.

3. Far Cry 3

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

The Far Cry series and the Cry engine has always been about amazing picturesque landscapes and vistas that are filled with homicidal psychopaths who want to rip you apart. Jason Brody’s adventure in Far Cry 3 stays true to the course. Far Cry 3 gives fans a new villain to love-to-hate in pirate lord Vaas, and a leveling system that reflects Jason’s journey from spoiled rich kid with no focus to epic jungle vigilante. While some of the skills you unlock may seem common place in other shooters, what is really going on is the protagonist is learning to fight and kill while becoming better at it over time. The theme of a hidden tropical island beset by pirates and mercenaries has never been more fun to explore.

Geist01

1. Lollipop Chainsaw

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

Almost everyone here has Lollipop Chainsaw in their top 3 NSFW games of 2012, which is no surprise because the game oozes sex. That’s not all it is though. This Suda 51/James Gunn collaboration features a strong voice cast, a hilariously tongue-in-cheek script, and fun game mechanics. Lollipop Chainsaw isn’t perfect, but once you sink your teeth into it you realize it was a labor of love for the development team that is dripping with so much charm and personality that it’s easy to overlook its mistakes. As one of the few games I platinumed this year on the PS3, I recommend everyone checks out Lollipop Chainsaw, especially if you can find it for $30.

2. Resident Evil: Revelations

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

Not only was Resident Evil: Revelations one of the best games I’ve played for the Nintendo 3DS this year, it was one of my favorite entries in the series to date. I loved the setting, the enemies, the weapon customization, and the costumes. Trust me, you will become very familiar with Jill Valentine’s perfect ass during the course of Revelations thanks to her skintight wetsuit. Speaking of wetsuits, check out Chris Redfield’s partner Jessica’s wetsuit in the game. Whoever designed that should win an award! If you are a fan of the Resident Evil series you owe it to yourself to play Revelations. It’s worth buying a 3DS for (though you might not have to since it’s supposed to come to consoles next year as a downloadable title).

3. Spec Ops: The Line

NSFW Gamer's Top Games of 2012

Obviously Spec Ops: The Line doesn’t really fall into the “sexy” side of NSFW but what it lacks in hotness it makes up for with sheer violence. Very few games this year had the disturbing emotional impact that this one had. Unlike other military shooters with big action set pieces, Spec Ops: The Line forces you to live with, and try to make sense of, the choices you are forced to make and the consequences that come with them. Every gamer should experience Spec Ops: The Line for themselves, even if third person shooters aren’t normally your thing. It’s that damn good.

Be Sociable, Share!
Both comments and pings are currently closed.

Comments are closed.